Integrated services lady meets dinky again

She is definitely my favourite professional so far!

Again my parenting is ruled out of why dinky is the way she is!

Lets start from the beginning.

Today integrated services woman wanted to meet dinky again before the TAC meeting in July.

Dinky came home from school nicely with her now and next. (Which was done by the senco yesterday! :-0 wow) Today it was done by the head of early years whom I have now taken a big dislike to, after Tuesdays mess.
We came home and dinky span for a few minutes and then sat playing with playdoh.
Dinky showed her the playdoh, then a glittery ball, she was almost bouncing off the walls as much as the ball was!
She showed the lady her newly decorated room and most of her toys. Dinky wanted to play hide and seek and the lady did it the first time and said no the second time. Dinky pleaded but the woman said no.then she said she would if dinky put her book back. She put her book back!!!
The lady counted, dinky hid. It was funny to watch.
Back downstairs the lady said she wanted to talk to me. Dinky was not happy with that. She then said she wanted tv and when I said no hit me. So in this ridiculous attempt at consistent NT parenting I put up the warning. She hit me again. 2nd warning. Then she put the tv on, and wouldn’t step away then threw the remote at the wall. 3rd warning up to her room.
She spat, bit my leg and was punching me whilst screaming. She was trying to get out of her room and I was putting her back in. Once she had done her time she came out, ran downstairs without waiting. She went under the table, the integrated services lady tried to talk to her and she was saying “I can’t hear you”! Then became intent on punishing me for being ‘mean’. The conversation she was having with the integrated services lady was interesting. According to dinky, I leave my toys out for her to step on. However she was saying this as she was putting hard bits of playdoh on the floor for me to step on! She carried on the conversation about how mean I am for not letting her have things she is not supposed to while she was taking down the pictures of school from her visual timetable.
Dinky was then swinging on the doors and banged her elbow. I comforted her with a hug, the integrated services lady asked if she liked hugs. “No, not really.” “Are you sure”, “yes, I don’t really like hugs.”
Which is true, she tends to be like an ironing board, I hug her and she puts her head on my shoulder. I only get her hands round me if she wants something or she is trying to comfort me when I am play crying.

When we were talking the lady said that it is not a parenting problem as I am doing everything I possibly can. She did mention consistency. The only thing consistent is how short term things work with dinky, I am going to keep going with the warning system. Even if it doesn’t work at all it will prove I can be consistent, dinky just doesn’t respond!

We have a date for the TAC, which I think will be extremely interesting.

There wasn’t really much else to say. She only came round to meet Dinky again as she can not turn up to the TAC having met her once. Twice probably isn’t that much better, but she has seen dinky explode, she has seen her control, demand avoidance, role play, in her own world. She has seen all this and seen it in the home environment so it isn’t just my word when it comes to the paediatrician appointment in 10 days.

It should be interesting to see what happens tomorrow at school. They still haven’t broached the trip with me. Also, as of yet, no one has mentioned my letter, however I do not think the senco being in dinky’s class with her doing the now and next at home time was a coincidence when it has been ‘in use’ for 2 days previously.

Well, it will not be dull leading up to the 8th (paed) and then the 11th (TAC)

Probably isn’t

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3 thoughts on “Integrated services lady meets dinky again

  1. Got to be good news that she has actually made the effort to see Dinky at home, and that she has seen that side of her too. Will help you to have someone in the room who can back you up. Good luck x

  2. Hiya, hopefully the TAC meeting goes well! I dont think one of these has ever been held for Xavier! A lot of her behaviours sound similar to Xav’s. Will check back and see how it went! Good luck xx

  3. Thanks ladies.

    She seems to be on our side. Or on dinky’s side, which is where I want her. The school aren’t doing much but hopefully that will change after the TAC.

    X

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