A few things yesterday got me pretty annoyed.
First, Dinky’s brand new PE kit goes missing. So I take her to the office after school, and because I haven’t brought her new scooter with me she has a meltdown in the office, not violent, but crying/screaming and unable to calm down. When we get home, I was surprised to see a contact book. I was even more surprised to see it was like a timetable with the following statements
– would not participate (reading)
– participated well, some good ideas (9.15-10)
-upset that she couldn’t attend assembly as she wanted to sing
– would not participate (maths)
I think her school have taken extra doses of muppet pills in the mornings! The agreement was that they weren’t going to force her into assembly if she didn’t want to go… Not a blanket ban on her attending assemblies. They just do not get that the whole idea is to support Dinky, and lessen her anxiety. The other bits are good evidence for a statement, which I drafted last night while Dinky was in bed.
The school still haven’t given me the rest of the paperwork that they were supposed to give.
Then Dinky wanted to phone her nan (fathers side). Which was fine, but then when she spoke to me she seemed unhappy with the whole PDA/ASD thing. She said she wants to see reports and be involved in meeting to give her view as a grandparent. Which is all well and good, except, she doesn’t KNOW dinky. Sure she has had her over night a few times when she was 2-3years old, once every 2-3 months, she has never attended a birthday, she missed the first 18 months and missed the last 2 years (bar 3-4 sporadic meet ups). Then there is the fact that Dinky mostly behaved for her, and then was more difficult at home for the next few days. She has nothing to add, and I’m annoyed she thinks that she knows enough to add anything.
I’m not saying it was all her own doing, she didn’t think she could see dinky as a baby, then in the last 2 years her marriage broke down. However she has no idea about the day to day living with Dinky. It’s all well and good being fun nan, coming in and out when you can, but it doesn’t give a true reflection on the child’s (in this case Dinky’s) strengths and difficulties.
She hasn’t known dinky really, since dinky started school. she has seen her a total of twice in the last year.
When she asked about school it was obvious she had no clue what so ever about how the system works. When I mentioned the special school, she was asking if it was a good idea to put her in ‘with all those other autistics’.
I was starting to get the impression she didn’t believe Dinky had any difficulties not related to the homelessness.
I can’t wait to get a diagnosis for Dinky, maybe then people will stop blaming me, or thinking they know her best. I’m sick of it!
This morning dinky didn’t want to go to school, she was shouting at me saying ‘why do you do this?’… What was so bad? I set the dressing timer and laid out her uniform. She was warned that I wouldn’t let her go on her scooter if she carried on, because I wouldn’t t able to trust her enough to stop when asked. She just couldn’t control herself. I had to say no, which led to more screaming and hitting.
Again on the way to school she had to have her ear defenders on.
She went in ok through the office.
I have spoken to the special school and have an appointment to go and view it at the end of October just before half term.
Things are moving in a direction… Time will tell if it is the right one. All I know is that Dinky can’t continue at this school.