Preparing for the TAC…

I know I said I wouldn’t post this weekend, but for the last 45 minutes I have been sitting here looking at the screen trying to formalize my thoughts.

Dinky being in nurture is very difficult to figure out.

At the beginning of this school year Dinky was in nurture in the afternoons. The muppet, being the muppet said to look up nurture groups on the internet. What stupid advice to give someone! These were the 2 paragraphs I commented on the last time I read up on the Boxall profile.

Boxall brought into school a different way of looking at the

behaviour that was getting in the way of the child’s progress.

She focused on children’s early development, on their selfconcept,

on the attitudes they had absorbed and brought

with them into school. She understood the difficulties

presented by most of these children as the outcome of

impoverished early nurturing. Lacking an adequate

experience of being cherished and attended to, for whatever

reason, they were not able to make trusting relationships

with adults or to respond appropriately to other children.

They were unready to meet the social and intellectual

demands of school life, and so failed.


Why is the profile so relevant today?

It is widely agreed that children with social, emotional and

behavioural difficulties (SEBD) are the biggest challenge to the

effective running of schools. These are children who do not

respond to teachers’ best efforts, they fail to learn, they can

leave teachers frustrated, quite often resentful and with their

professional confidence undermined. They also spoil the

atmosphere for the rest of the class, consuming the teacher’s

time and energy, diverting it away from children who could use

it so much better.


This is my mother… not me. It rocked me to the core. It also shows a complete lack of understanding and a level of unprofessionalism only ever accepted in the teaching profession when it comes to kids with SEBD. The thing is who is deciding which kids have SEBD? Educational psychologists? no… SENCO’s, Muppet Head teachers and teachers. Who undoubtedly are educated, but they are not experts in child psychology/ educational psychology. They are given powers to decide what constitutes as SEBD, and through the Boxall profile are given licence to ASSUME that a child has a poor home life.

The things I have found today are just as disgusting

  • Confronted with a child whose anxiety-provoking behaviour seems to make no sense, the Profile is where you start. It gives you insights and suggests points of entry into the child’s world:  writes a teacher with a class of 6-year olds.

  • It is very easy to use, quick and constructive. It is only too easy for teachers to start labelling children as aggressive or psychopathic. The Profile makes people think about what lies behind the behaviour: writes the Head of Education in a residential special school for children with serious emotional and behavioural difficulties.

The thing is the Boxall profile doesn’t actually give concrete insight into the childs behaviour. It tells them what they already know. that the child is not coping. They then decide whether it is along the lines of attachment, if it isn’t, they just slap a label of SEBD on them and then assume it is also due to the home environment. It is too easy for teachers to go labelling children as aggressive or psychopathic, and it is just as easy for them to assume the parent is to blame.

If you try and use those paragraphs to sum up Dinky, then it becomes even worse.


The Muppet said she didn’t think I was a bad parent, so why is she back in nurture? Apparently to see how she fairs in a different learning environment. Which I can see the merit of, but will anyone else see that? See that her behaviour is not because I have turned into my mother, or because I have failed to provide her with the early nurturing she needed, but because she cant cope with the large classroom and the demands that come with it. I very much doubt it. I doubt anyone would see autism in Dinky, because most people are ignorant to just how wide the spectrum is, or how each person with autism is different and struggle with different things in different ways.

I don’t normally cry but I am so upset at the general way Dinky is let down and how indifferent everyone seems to her outcomes.

I think I might have to do some firing on Monday in the TAC.

We don’t need the family link worker who hasn’t been supportive, if anything I have had to teach her over and over again as she hasn’t got a clue about pre or post diagnosis support, or what is available for what age. When she came round with the integrated services lady, I was annoyed that they could both just sit there in MY house and have a private discussion. The family link worker already said she doesn’t know why she is involved with Dinky anymore as there is nothing she can do. Fine.. goodbye!

The integrated services lady’s boss will be there. I will bring up how she doesn’t seem to want to know until a week before the TAC and then doesn’t include me in anything. Then says nothing as CAMHS pass Dinky by, even though I TOLD her that CAMHS are the only ones who can diagnose and that she is staying with the paediatrician who can do the developmental tests, the CDC just needed their input. But she didn’t fight. I don’t have time for half hearted, nor does Dinky, not when she is getting only getting 3 hours support a month from her special needs group, and the school seem to do what ever they feel like

So being a lead professional and a family link worker down, I don’t know how this is going to go.

I need to mention the Nurture group and ask what the plan is and then object on the basis that she doesn’t have attachment or SEBD. If they fight me I have half a mind to take her out of the school there and then.

other than that we are just going round in circles.

I don’t now what to do.

The school will not change.

I have reports coming from the swim teachers, and I think I will have to say again…

I said in april dinky has PDA, we now have a provisional diagnosis. I said in July that dinky would find year 1 harder- and she is. I said in September that she wouldn’t cope with the demands and her behaviour would get worse- it has. I said I October that she may seem settled now, but it wont last- I was right… When will they listen?

They said she was on target academically- they were wrong. they said she had attachment disorder- they were wrong. They said they could fix her- they were wrong. They said she was more settled- they were wrong.

Why wont they listen?

I really do not know how I can be any clearer!


Should I get a banner made?


I guess at the moment I am going to be prone to utter disbelief , anger and tears.


3 thoughts on “Preparing for the TAC…

  1. good luck tomorrow DM. Just incase you do decide to home ed Dinky, temporarily, until either the issues are sorted it or until you get your official diagnosis, which will help with a statement it appears you can still pursue a statement. I know that home ed is a last resort but just thought I would share the links incase you go down this path xxx

    HE and Special Educational Needs – 2
    Page 2 of 4

    Can I request a Statement of Special Educational Needs?
    You can request a Statement, but it will only be of benefit to your child if he/she is attending a school. Whilst it may give you an idea of what your child’s special educational needs are, it is not a legally enforceable document for home educators. However, it can be useful if you wish your child to return to school in the near future, especially a special school. When home educators request an assessment for a statement, the same time frame is used as if the child was in school. You will need to allow time (at least 6 months) for this if you want your child to go to a special school, or to have support in mainstream.

  2. good luck today, I really don’t know how you manage to keep attending these meetings on your own and fighting for Dinky. I am keeping everything crossed that someone finally breaks rank and stands your corner with you.xxxxx

    • Thank you Jane.
      I go in knowing I am right. I know my dinky and have do much support to come back to from the online pda army!
      Thank you for your support. .. and the info above is golden… thanks.
      Will let you know how it goes.

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