Dinky’s special needs group clubhouse was in the next town, today they opened the new house in our town! Dinky has been counting down the days!
This morning she was a hyper ball of hyperness. She constantly asked when we were going, breakfast was a nightmare, getting dressed was a nightmare, walking sky was a nightmare.
Luckily we were getting a lift with another parent, I wouldn’t have fancied taking her on the bus given the level of anxiety and excitement pouring out of her. She just couldn’t wait to get there.
When the other parent came, her son was in the front and dinky was asked to sit in the back. Dinky did not like this AT ALL. she went into toddler talk and wanted to sit on my lap. She was refusing to sit down at all. Until the other parent offered the front seat. Her son happily jumped out and came and sat in the back with me. Dinky was now happy she got to sit in the front. She had NEVER sat in the front of a car before!
She talked all the way there about lego, Sky the dog and the guinea pigs. The other mum tried to talk to her, but dinky was in her monologue mode. Never let it be said that dinky doesn’t show more traditional ASD traits!
When we got there there was only one other child and a sea of adults
The mayor, the mp, the CEO of the SN group, and tons of other professional type people and organisations.
They had Dinky and the lad we were with to hold the ribbon and the lad who was there first got to cut the ribbon with the mayor.
Then one of Dinky’s friends came and he helped Dinky with the ribbon holding. Which was a good job really because a few flashes from cameras was too much for Dinky and she hid her face and began to cry, I ran over picked her up and carried her off, she was head butting my shoulder, she does not do well with bright lights, I didn’t think they would need the flash in the sunshine, however they used it.
A few concerned people asked if she was ok, so I explained that she was over sensitive to bright lights and especially the bright unexpected flash from a camera.
Then the doors opened and Dinky ran in. I went in after her, she spent a few minutes in the soft play room and then ran into the garden. It is brilliant! The garden has a massive sandpit p surrounded by AstroTurf with an AstroTurf snake hill.
Dinky loved playing in the sand pit.
A child set the fire alarm off (I was relieved it wasn’t Dinky 😉 hahaha), and it seemed, once the alarm was silenced that they did another ribbon to open the garden, Dinky stayed away from the cameras happily building a fort for king Neptune from spongebob square pants.
Later dinky went back into the soft play area, it was crowded over by the door and I couldn’t see what was going on, but I heard her and then saw an 8 year old boy kicking and pushing her, Dinky was giving as good as she got, actually at one point giving the lad a proper right hook. As much as she was defending herself, I had to tell her that she shouldn’t hit back. She refused to leave, and I had to restrain her because the other boys parents were not around and she kept trying to go after him. She then ran off, I had to chase her outside where she went round the side of the building and then found that the gate didn’t have a lock on, so she managed to open it quickly and tried to make a run for it! Luckily I caught her before she had managed to really get out and get in her stride, she kicked and punched me, as I tried to put the gate back, luckily a parent was there to shut the gate for me while I dodged and weaved through the crowd back inside to find Dinky.
(one of the good things about it being a special needs clubhouse is that not a single parent batted an eyelid to see me tearing off after my little person!)
I found her, she had barricaded herself in the buggy room, I didn’t think it was a good idea as there were taps in there. I was standing next to the new centre manger, I couldn’t hear an issue, dinky was asking me to leave her alone, so I told her what had happened and she might want to secure the gate so that more children do not escape. She went off and came back, she went into the room, and dinky hid in the cupboards. She didn’t want me anywhere near her, said I was following her.
Between us we managed to calm dinky down enough with frozen songs and then got dinky to come and try some cakes.
Once she was calm she decided to stay and eat some more cakes, then the fire alarm went off again. They tried to evacuate, but Dinky was having NONE of it, she sniffed the air and looked around, said “I can’t see fire, I can’t smell fire, there is no fire” and refused point blank to leave. 3 members of staff tried to get Dinky to leave, tried to explain that there could be a fire in another room, nothing. They tried to get her to ‘show them’ her favourite bit in the new garden…. Nope, she was not moving. So while the whole building was evacuated, dinky sat at the table eating cake!
Dinky then went off to play in the sensory room, which she absolutely loved!
There was a guitar, and a box full of fabrics, dinky was trying out the fabrics and then strumming, she was really relaxed.
She went back into the soft play and then had yet ANOTHER fight with the same boy, I had to restrain her again with her biting me and hurting me because he kept winding her up and she was going to hurt him.
Then she was back in the garden. She was having so much fun out there.
Then she went into the lounge which had toys and dressing up stuff just as it was time to go. She was wearing a red dress and wouldn’t take it off. She was allowed to wear a dress home from the other house the last time we were there, so she couldn’t understand why she couldn’t borrow this one. I ended up having to wrestle her out of it as the centre manager said she couldn’t wear it out.
I had to chase her and then had to physically remove her, she was calming down and then we had the usual calm down refusal to move due to hunger. Someone grabbed her a cake, but she didn’t like that one, and ended up taking the centre managers apple home!
We went home via mc Donald’s, I hadn’t managed to get the wrist reins on her and once we got the food and headed back to the car, Dinky ran across the road to ‘get to the car first’, she didn’t hear me shout STOP! And she didn’t understand why I was cross and scared. Although she probably only saw cross.
It was a nightmare.
Once we got home she was winding the dog up, I ended up getting her dressed for bed, and now she is upstairs with her iPad and I’m sitting here thankful that my dad is coming over tomorrow so that I can go do the shopping as we are almost out of everything!
It will feel like respite!
I love dinky but today was intense! At one point I had to move away from certain areas because I couldn’t handle the noise!
Fingers crossed tomorrow is a better day for her, however that depends on my dad.
I did talk to him the other night and explained that his ‘helping’ wasn’t helpful as he kept being too direct with her. He has promised to really try to think before he speaks. I asked him not to tell me but show me, as he has said he would be less direct for a year and he hasn’t. We shall see!