My job? I am my child’s carer

There is a new single parent forum where I live and I joined it for some solidarity. Yesterday a question was asked by the group admin who obviously felt things were a bit quiet 

How are you all finding back to school with childcare and school runs?

This is a little awkward for me, and I was thinking of not replying to this particular question, but I felt the need to show them that not all single parents have the luxury of finding adequate childcare and holding down a full time job. 

So I replied 

As Dinky’s carer, childcare isn’t an issue for me, and she goes to school in a taxi, which has been hellish because they didn’t turn up on the second day and have been varying degrees of late ever since

I’m so tired of the question: “so what are you going to do for work now Dinky is at school?”

Or hearing “now Dinky is at school, you can get a job and earn some money”

I HAVE A JOB!  I am my child’s carer

My list of duties while she is at school

  • Source respite 
  • Pay respite 
  • Pay Tax
  • File paperwork
  • Chase meds 
  • Chase referrals and appointments
  • Go to appointments
  • Go to regular meetings at school
  • Take numerous phone calls from school- from teacher once a week, from therapists – OT, SaLT, Drama and almost daily calls from the TA
  • Go to workshops to learn things I need to get dinky the correct support 
  • Research 
  • Making visuals
  • Relax

My hours of care (Dinky requires more supervision and more care than the average 7 year old)

School days 

  • 1am- 2/3am
  • 5/6am-7.50am
  • 4.10pm-9/10pm (sometimes later)

So I have a full time job! I am my child’s carer!

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4 thoughts on “My job? I am my child’s carer

  1. Yes, yes and yes! I am lucky that I don’t think most people expect me to work outside the home, but possibly as I have so many children, but I did used to get sick of the question “what will you do when they’re at school?” it is never-ending, and with 3 of my kids diagnosed on the spectrum I often spend what feels like hours on the phone or at meetings.

    • I think I have enough to be getting on with when it comes to Dinks- having more than one on the spectrum must make paperwork a nightmare!

      I think ‘some’ people instantly assume that you can’t be a carer for your own kiddo because that is your job as a parent.

      I’d love to film 24hours in our lives and then ask if that is a typical 24 hours in other parents lives.

      • Paperwork, shopping, it makes everything complicated as they are all so different in their needs, and their ways of communication.

        The 24 hour thing would really make a lot of people sit up and take notice. Perhaps I should arrange it and send to the people in charge of respite, to see if they would bump up my 2 hours a fortnight :-/

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